- "Goodbye, beloved GRANDPA.." -

I'm proud to ever had a grandpa like you.. You'll forever remain in my heart, for sure.. Thanks for everything, grandpa Harjono Bunadi.. Goodbye, we'll meet again someday when it's time.. Gonna miss you sooo muchhh.. I LOVE YOU! :')

I love you.. I really do! :')

We'll never forget you, forever :)

Dear my beloved brother..

Tomorrow is gonna be my only-brother's marriage day..
It's all been prepared since last year when he proposed his girl who's now going to be my sister in law soon :)

What do I feel?
I thought that I'd feel nothing about his leaving and everything would be just the same as usual..
But I know that I'm totally wrong since now I suddenly decide to write this blog just to share all about my random emotions that come across my mind and heart, realizing that within less than 24 hours my bro will leave this house and my family to start his new life with his new family :')
It's been months since the last time I wrote my latest blog but tonight I have no other better way to say everything to my beloved bro (you know, I would definitely cry before I say A WORD to him, so maybe it's just better to write everything here just to let him know what I feel now..)

Dear my beloved-only-brother, Daniel V.W.,
Life's not always easy for us..
When we're just a little brother and sister, we quarreled a lot..
You always made me feel annoyed and made me cried each day,
Then I always came to mom or dad to tell them everything and then they got mad to you :P

When you were in Junior High School and I was in Primary School..
You always made me waiting for you playing football at school for hours in exhaust!
Never gonna forget the way we treated our driver at that time *sensor* hahaha :P

When you were in Senior High School and I was in Junior High School..
We became more mature and got closer to each other
We told stories and jokes.. We laughed in my room from night till dawn..
We talked about everything: families, friends, special friends, dreams, culinary, religions, simply EVERYTHING!
We made many crazy recordings (which I still keep until now)
We didn't even sleep those nights coz we never ran out of topics while being together
We were really close even 'till I was at University..
Even some of my friends were envious coz they were not close to their brother/sister like us!

Sometimes we got angry and didn't talk to each other when we both were not in the mood
But as soon as we've got better, we always laughed together again ^^
Within 22 years of my life and 26 years of yours in our family, we've been through a lot of things together..
Not only good times, but there were also many hard times in our family..
Yes, a very hard one, but we managed to survive together and strengthened each other!
When our parents quarreled, it was only you whom I could talk to :')
I always shared everything to you and so you did to me..

Time goes by so fast..
Tomorrow is gonna be your wedding day!
I never thought that you'll be married on 26 years old, never thought that I would lose a brother that fast :')

Dear brother,
I've always been wishing the best for you and for the rest of your life! :)
I do feel sad when I realize that we've got even farther day by day since last year :')
We rarely told stories and spend times together now because of so many things happened unpredictably..
And we're definitely not as close as before :')
But that's alright coz now I can see that you've really found your happiness and I'm happy for you, really! ^^

I'm gonna miss you in this house
Gonna miss the way we chatted late at night in my room
Gonna miss the way you woke up at noon
Gonna miss the way we told stupid jokes just like stupid 10 years old children
Gonna miss everything about you here, bro! :')

I'm sorry for everything about me that annoys you through these whole years,
you know I never really mean it..
I'm sorry for often misunderstand you and get mad to you unreasonably..
I'm sorry if I've ever been wrong in judging you..

Thanks for taking care of me these years,
and for driving me to campus or my workplace..
Thanks for all the advice and suggestions,
for the strengths and cheers when I get down..
I've learned so many things that I will never forget from you..

I just want you to know that I've always been loving you as my only brother, and I've always been thankful for having a bro like you, with all your strengths and weaknesses in my eyes :')
I really wish that we would still have a good and close relationship even after you get married tomorrow :)
Really wish nothing would change between us as brother and sister forever :)

I love you, bro!
Have I ever told you about that? :)
If I haven't, now at least you know it.. :')

Take a good care always bro! :)
Nobody could ever replace your place in my heart.
Never forget our parents and me, ok ;)
Feel free to share everything with me if you need.. Coz I'll forever be your little sister ^^
It's a fact that would never change :)

P.S: I wish I could hug you on your wedding day without getting tears rolled down in my eyes!

With a hugeeee hugss n love,,

Your forever sist, Astrid :)

No words can express how afraid I am to face the day after tomorrow.. :')

- "my GRADUATION day!!" -

After struggling hard through the past 3.5 years,

yesterday I finally stand here as a graduate of Atma Jaya Catholic University :)

I'm officially Astrid Marcella, S.Pd. now, considered as the 2nd best graduate in the English Department with a GPA of 3.80..

Thank YOU, Jesus, for the strengths and spirit that I've got from You since the very 1st day I started my study in this university.. One thing that I've always believed and held on to: "When You've put a dream in my heart, You'll never forget to give me the strength and ability to achieve that dream."
And yesterday.. 21st April 2012, You proved it to me that I can do all things with You who strengthen me (Philippians 4:13).

There's no any single reason for me to doubt Your mighty hands who works amazingly upon my life, Jesus :')

From the deepest of my heart, I want to bring my grateful heart to You because I know exactly that everything would never be the same without You.. Without You, I'm nothing!

Thank You, dearest Jesus.. I LOVE YOU abundantly :*

I also want to give thanks to my beloved parents who always support me in every condition and time.. They always support me with their unconditional love.. They are the biggest reasons for me to keep on fighting and not giving up through all the hard times in my study.. To see them smile and proud of me in my graduation, and to give them the VIP invitation is the reason why I never stop on dreaming.. And today.. That dream comes true.. I saw them smiling from the VIP chairs.. What else should I ask for more? :')

This is what I've ever promised to my parents.. The VIP one!! :')

Their smiles are enough for me :')

Not being forgotten, I know exactly that I would never been able to go through all these things without the support, prayers,advice, and loves from my best friends Ria Wulandari and Sulistia Wijaya.. And also for my beloved one, Kevin Oarto. You guys really made a big differences in my life! You guys gave me too many beautiful memories that I would never forget for the rest of my life :')

Thank you guys for all that we've been through together for all these times.. Thank you for all the tears and laughter that color my life and make me the way I am now :)

There's no enough words to tell you how much you guys mean to me and how much I love you all :")

My IRREPLACEABLE best friends <3

My beloved man :*

And last but not least.. I want to say thank you for all my honorable lecturers and staffs, FKIP friends, brothers and sisters from PDKK St. Hieronimus and Brotherhood in God, all my family, colleagues, and everybody around me who never stop giving me the support and love.. All your kindness would never be forgotten in my heart :)

We've got the rings.. by the grace of God :)

The Graduation @JCC

I do really love you all! :*

Thanks for all the gifts :)

Thanks God for making this possible for me :')

HAPPY GRADUATION!! :D

Astrid Marcella, S.Pd.

Tomorrow's gonna be my graduation day..

The day that I've been waiting for these 3.5 years..

With a grateful and humble heart,

I wanna say thank You, Jesus,

for everything that You've done for me

'till I can have my graduation tomorrow..

It would never be the same without You..

What an amazing blessing to have such a great God like You..

I LOVE YOU :")

- "Goodbye dearest UNCLE.." -

2012.. Since the very beginning of this year I've realized that 2012 will be an unforgettable year for me. Many important things that influence my life a lot, I guess, will happen throughout this year.. These are some big events that I've predicted before:
1. I will finish my Scientific Writing and graduate
2. Kevin will also finish his thesis and graduate together with me
3. Kevin will continue his study to USA at least for 2 years :')
4. I will start working full time in a new place and quit from my 1st job
5. My bro will get married at the end of this year and I'll be a single child in my house soon

The 1st and 2nd prediction have actually happened. I just have to wait for my "real" graduation on 21st april, and Kevin's on 26th May :)

But one thing I've never predicted before has just happened in my recent days. Never at once I thought that I would lost one of my best uncles forever this year :")
He passed away a few days ago, leaving so many memories in our hearts..
Leaving a charisma that would never be able to be replaced by anybody else..
Leaving tears in our eyes, hardly letting him go and fly away..

It has just been a few days since his leaving, but gosh I can't describe how I've missed him already :")
And how sad it is to realize that he's not around us anymore..

It killed our hearts to see him struggling hard with his sickness for the past 3 years
To see him dying in a few days before his death
To see his stiff body lied down inside a coffin and finally cremated
Yes, it did really killed our hearts to let his ash sank down the sea

Sometimes I wonder.. Why should there always be a "goodbye"?

Goodbye my dearest Uncle, you'll forever be loved and remained in our hearts :')

God, I surrender everything in Your hands..

I know there are lots of things I'm worrying about,

lots of things I wanna complain about.

But I just want to put it all in Your mighty hands

and let You take care of all my worries.

Please give me the strength and ability

to give my best on my defense day

so I can pass it well, with a good grade.

Amen.

- " HAPPY 1st anniv :)" -

Hey isn't it 26 January 2012?
It means that me and Kevin have spent our first year in love together!! :) :)
Wew.. Time flies really really fast.
I still remember clearly 365 days ago when he picked me up at the English course where I worked and took me home.. We had our dinner together and finally he told me about his feelings towards me and asked me to be his girlfriend with a lovely white rose in his hand.. :)
That was so sweet. I was speechless at that time but then I finally answered "YES" and he held my hands :")
Since that time, we're dating.
Sharing love, laugh, and tears together every single day.
Supporting, helping and caring each other. <3

I can't imagine what would my days be without him loving me. He has brought a whole amazing year for me and it could never be replaceable with anything.. That special feeling every time he stares at me or holds my hands or just simply says "I LOVE YOU" has given me extra strength each day :)

The feeling I have towards him now has even grown more and more since the 1st time I fell in love with him. I really can't deny it. <3

I LOVE HIM MUCH DEEPER THAN I DID A YEAR AGO..

AND I'M GOING TO LET THIS FEELING GROW MORE AND MORE EVERY SINGLE DAY,

THROUGH THE YEARS AHEAD.. <3

A one year old lovely white rose now :)

Thanks for giving me 365 lovely days :)

HAPPY 1st ANNIVERSARY, dear! <3

- "happy BELATED new year!" -

Hi guys,
I'm really really sorry for haven't posted anything this quite long time because I've been so busy with my Scientific Writing (SW) :(
I've been so tired dealing with my SW every single day, even thinking about it every MINUTE, and I can't find my mood to write anything on my blog yet.. Huff. Really sorry about it T.T
Actually there are TONS OF THINGS that I want to share with you, guys.. But I really can't find the right time and mood to write it down on my blog :(
But I promise that I'll post more and more blogs right after I finish my SW! :D
Can't wait to share to you about my little reflection of 2011, how I spent my X'Mas and New Year, my resolutions for 2012, my results of the last semester, what happened to my SW, etc!! Quite a lot of "untold" stories, eh?! haha..
I do really miss those quality "blogging" time :')
Please keep checking out my blog and give some comments ok ^^

Anyway, last but not least, I want to say:

Wish you a super great year ahead!
More blessing. More love. More success. More patient. More luck.
Amennn ^^

Missing you a lot,

XOXO

- Astrid Marcella -