- "at the BEGINNING with YOU.." -

We were strangers starting out on a journey
Never dreaming what we'd have to go through
Now here we are..
I'm suddenly standing at the beginning with you..

No one told me I was going to find you
Unexpected what you did to my heart
When I lost hope you were there to remind me
This is the start..

And life is a road and I wanna keep going
Love is a river I wanna keep flowing
Life is a road now and forever wonderful journey

I'll be there when the world stops turning
I'll be there when the storm is through
In the end I wanna be standing at the beginning with you

We were strangers in a crazy adventure
Never dreaming how our dreams will come true
Now here we stand unafraid of the future
at the beginning with you..

Knew there was somebody somewhere
Like me alone in the dark
Now I know my dream will live on
I've been waiting so long
Nothing's gonna tear us apart

And life is a road and I wanna keep going
Love is a river I wanna keep flowing
Life is a road now and forever wonderful journey

I'll be there when the world stops turning
I'll be there when the storm is through
In the end I wanna be standing at the beginning with you

Let's we start our wonderful journey =)
30.10.10

"Love is handing someone a gun
and letting it point to your head..
And believing he won't pull the trigger."
- Spongebob -

To whom should I hand that gun then?

- "kusembah KAU Tuhan.." -

I accidentally found this song on my iPod and I fell in love with this song :)
This song represents my longing and desire for Him and I just wanna share it with you, guys..
It has a beautiful lyric that really touches and slaps my face! hehe..

Biarlah hidupku bagiMu
sebagai pujian berkenan
Dalam perbuatanku dan perkataanku
kusembah Kau Tuhan selalu

Aku mau bernyanyi setiap hari
bersyukur buat karya yang Kau b'ri
Dari pagi hari hingga datang malam
kusembah Kau Tuhan selalu

Seluruh hidupku kusembah Kau Tuhan s'lamanya
Seluruh hidupku kusembah Kau Tuhan s'lamanya

I wish it's not just a song, but a PRAYER from the deepest of our hearts (",)

I'm sick of other people's love stories.
I want MY OWN.
:'(

- "Finally.. Baliiiiiiiii!" -

BALIIIIIIII here we comeeeeee!! :D
Yeaahhhhhh last night Ria booked an Air Asia flight for the four of us:
Ria, Hartono, me and Sulis
to Bali on July 11-15, 2011 :)
Finally we got the tickets after struggling hard bcos the price was
unpredictably increasing! Pfiuhhh.

But we're soooo happy! hehehe..
Can't wait for that day ^^
Let's make a SAVING SAVING n SAVING starting from now hoho..
Come on Hiero'ers.. Quickly join us!!
The more people, the better! ^^

Thankssssss God for the chance!
*Hugggsssss*
XOXO

- "when there WAS me and you.." -

It's funny when you find yourself looking from the outside
I'm standing here but all I want is to be over there
Why did I let myself believe miracles could happen?
Cause now I have to pretend that I don't really care

I thought you were my fairytale
A dream when I'm not sleeping
A wish upon a star that's coming true
But everybody else could tell that I confused my feelings with the truth
When there was me and you

I swore I knew the melody that I heard you singing
And when you smiled you made me feel that I could sing along
But then you went and changed the words
Now my heart is empty
I'm only left with used-to-be's and once upon a song

Now I know you're not a fairytale
And dreams were meant for sleeping
And wishes on a star just don't come true
Cause now even I can tell that I confused my feelings with the truth
Cause I liked the view when there was me and you

I can't believe that I could be so blind
It's like you were floating when I was falling
and I didn't mind

Cause I liked the view
I thought you felt it too
When there was me and you..

- "Should I leave?" -

Dear my BiG,,

I thought that we're going to serve Him forever together
I thought that the spirit will always exist between us
I thought that our love and desire will never be expired
I thought that we're going to be a solid family forever
I thought that we will raise up and be much better than before
I thought that BiG will be BiGger and even be the BiGgest from time to time

But unfortunately,
I think I was wrong
I think it is quite impossibly happen
I think I should not put too much hope and expectations anymore

I've been waiting for so long to see us raise up
I've been praying too much
I've been so patient and keep all my sadness deep inside my heart

I really miss the way we used to be
the way we prayed together
the way we served Him
the way we worshiped
the way we played music
the way we danced
the way we gathered as a community
the way we spent laughter and tears
the way we organized retreats and events
the way we hung out to Puri mall after PD 'till late at night
the way we played monopoly while laughing out loud
the way we shared our problems and strengthened each other
the way we gave supports
the way we went to Dufan and Bandung

Don't you miss it too, guys? :'(

I was so proud of us that time..
I shared everything to my brothers and sisters at Hiero about us,
I wanted them to grow just like how we were..
But now.. I have almost nothing to share with them except my sadness of our condition.
I have nothing to be proud of.

I'm not even needed here.
I haven't been contributing a lot.
You all will keep going well without my presence,
so why should I stay?

All my close brothers and sisters have gone..
None of them stays beside me.
None of them really cares.
See.. I always feel lonely whenever I go there..
Feels like I just get there purely to serve Him,
and not to gather with my brothers and sisters..
I've lost you all.
Feels like you're not my second home anymore..
And I really miss you :'(

What hurts me the most is that I know that I can't do anything for us except keep praying and praying and praying..

If I may ask You one question, Lord..
Should I leave or should I stay? :'(

If You wanted me to leave, why didn't You take my heart away from BiG?
Why should I still love them?
Why should I care?

But if You wanted me to stay, please tell me what should I do..
Coz I can't overcome my sorrow for seeing this condition anymore, Lord..
You know I really love them T.T

Thanks for making it all clear..
I really appreciate the way you confess everything :)
Now just let life leads our ways then.

It's October already.
Means that 11 months have passed by..
and his shadow still comes over me sometimes.
w h a t a s t u p i d g i r l !